Tuesday, October 13, 2009

H-H-H-Henne beat the Jets

some clever Fin fan already has a parody song up on youtube
music courtesy of Elton John/Bernie Taupin


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Monday, October 12, 2009

Miami Dolphins- New York Jets live blog

8:42: Play 1, Henne dumps off to Ronnie Brown as a checkdown, Ronnie gets 10 yards out of it. Ronnie always falls forward for a few extra yards.

8:44 RONNIE completes a pass to Fasano out of the Wildcat for a 21 yard gain!
8:45 next play, Ricky handoff from Ronnie out of the Wildcat for 17 yards. LOVING THIS.

8:46: back in the traditional formation, Henne hands off to Ronnie for a nice gain. Fins, 2nd & 1 on the Jets 21. False start on Haynos.

1st referee penalty announcement is in Spanish. Odd.
Como se dice "off sides" in Espanol?

8:47: 2&6, Henne picks up the 1st down to Bess.

Henne completes to Ginn for a 1st!! NICE DRIVE. Just marching down on the Jets who seem to not be offering much of a pass rush.

Confusion on the Jets, they call a timeout.

1st & goal, Ronnie picks up 3ish

2nd& goal at the 3, Polite with the handoff, to about the 1.5 yard line


Seriously, they made that drive look easy. Let's see how the D responds to the Jets. I am guessing the first play will be designed for Braylon.

Jets first posession

I guessed wrong, it was a run up the gut for little or no gain

2&9 another run for a nice little gain of about 5 or 6 for Jones

3rd and 3ish for Dirty Sanchez

they run the Wildcat with Leon (The Fog is Getting Thicker and LEON IS GETTING LARGER) Washington at the throttle... and Channing Crowder thwarts him

BUT the Jets fake punt and get a 20 yard gain from the Punter. In keeping with the Spanish theme... "MIERDA!"

Sanchez completes a 20 yard pass because Sean Smith whiffs on the tackle. Feh.

Sanchez has all day to throw and gets a pass interference flag thrown on Yeremiah Bell. AWFUL.
2nd and goal from the 5, Sanchez floats one just out of reach to Brad Smith

3rd down, come on D.
Braylon Edwards. TD. Eff. Where was Will Allen playing?

Fins drive
9:12 pm
Jaws: "the grass is part of the ground"

1st down, short throw to Ricky off play-action
RICKY WILLIAMS takes a dump pass for a huuuuuuuuuge gain, like 60 yards

3 and nothing after that leads to a Carpenter field goal


Jets ensuing posession

Question: is posession the only word that follows ensuing? Have you ever used ensuing in daily speak?

3rd and one after Thomas Jones gets 9 on 2 handoffs.
Sidenote: Thomas Jones' brother is the Seahawks Julius Jones. Is Julius Jones the 3rd most famous Julius in the world after Caesar and Erving?

End of 1st Quarter.

Crowder really playing with passion tonight, due to his Rex Ryan war of words.

3rd & 11, Will Allen has an illegal contact penalty, automatic 1st down. Awful call by the ref.

1st down, Leon with a 9 yard rush.
2nd, he gets the 1st down

ball on the Jets 45

2nd & 10... Sanchez with the draw play to Thomas Jones, stopped in the backfield by Jason Ferguson

3rd& 11 again.. big play here, Sanchez overthrows everyone, big stop (unless the Jets fake punt again)

punt goes into the endzone, Fins will get the ball back with 10:30 to go on the 20


Fins posession

Ronnie 15 yards out of the Wildcat
Ricky direct Wildcat snap for a gain of near 7

Henne back in on 2nd down
in shotgun
hands off to Ricky who is tackled for a big loss in the backfield by Kris Jenkins
great play by him

3rd & 9

incomplete to Hartline, will punt

Jets ball

False start
1st & 15
Leon Washington run
2& 5
Washington again with a nice gain

1st down completion to Braylon

3rd & 3 now..
incomplete to Edwards

punt coming up

another fake. Fuck.

2& 20 after a penalty, Leon Washington gains 11

3rd down, short completion for the Jets, (apparent) field goal attempt coming up

Jay Feeley ties it up, 10-10


1st down coming up from about the 18.

Jets have 102 rushing yards, Fins 52
total yards about even

Henne rolls away and has a nice completion to Ronnie called back because of a holding penalty on Grove. Dammit.

2nd & 17, 1:20 left

Ronnie with a rush for little or no gain, Jets call timeout, they may get decent field position with 1:00 left.

Fins punting from the 5 or so, 1:13 left. Feh.

Sanchez with a 13 yard gainer to Leon Washington.
2 quick completions by Sanchez
definite fg range

Feeley kicks the 43 yarder, 13-10 and the Jets will get the ball to start the 3rd.

now I have to change the channel, Chris Berman is putrid.

3rd quarter commences

Might I say, if the Fins win this game, they'd be only 1 game behind the Pats and Jets
grow a pair.

Thomas Jones takes the opening handoff for 7.
Come on.
Another first down.

6 yard completion for Braylon

Will Allen had the interception in his grasp on 3rd down and dropped iut

(apparent) punt coming up


Fins at the 20. Let's see a drive like we had to open the game, please.

Finally, they unleash Chad a little and he zips a nice pass to Haynos for 17 yards

then they immediately go... to the Wildcat (why?)
Ricky for 3 off direct snap
Ricky direct snap for no gain
3rd and 7, blitz comes and Henne incomplete pass to Polite

Nice punt to about the 7

Gruden makes a good point, we haven't heard Porter or Taylor's name called on the defense
no pass rush

Ugg Gibril Wilson called for a controversial personal foul

3rd & 9 now

Washington swallowed up by JT!

Jets punt

Fins ball from the 36

Ronnie rushes for 7
Ronnie again rushes, close to a 1st
3rd and 1, Lou "Mr 1st Down" Polite gets it

Henne on 1st throws a checkdown to Ronnie for 5
2nd and 5 from midfield, quick pass to Bess who got about 10 but got shoestring tackled saving a much bigger play

Chad was in a rhythm so what do they do? Wildcat of course.
Nice gain of 5 for Ronnie though
another gain of 6 for Ronnie, 1st down off the Wildcat

Ronnie with another Wildcat rush on 1st down and gains nearly 5
Gruden is orgasming over him
botched Wildcat play, Ronnie was trying to throw but stumbled, throws it out of bounds
3rd and 6, Henne comes back in, Tirico echoes my point, Henne has to come in cold and out of rhythm and try and pick up a first on 3rd and medium

now Wildcat again after Henne calls time out, and Ricky with a GREAT run and hurdle
love Ricky
1st and 10 from the 15
Henne with a short gainer to Polite after stepping up in the pocket
2&5, Ricky takes the Henne handoff for about 4.5
3rd and a yard or less... pitches to Ricky who takes it to the 1!
..end of 3rd... let's get Ronnie to punch it in when we come back!

Ronnie takes the handoff on 1st and goal... and is stuffed..
must get a TD this drive...
2nd and goal... playaction pass, Henne rolls out in bootleg, throws from his back foot to Fasano!!!!! TD!!!!

17-13 good guys!
15 plays, nearly 9 minutes
Sanchez responds with a frigging bomb to Clowney, he had till Cinco de Mayo to make that pass

50+ yards

big sack by the Fins, refs debating if it was intentional grounding or not
they rule intentional grounding but its over Jaws' dead body
3rd & 22... Sanchez with a touchdown to Braylon Edwards. Sick.
Why does Jaworski call him Mark San-CHEZ, is that the proper annunciation?

Fins challenge it, looks like his knee was down before ball crossed.

fins win the challenge, Jets score anyway on 1st and 1 from Thomas Jones. Only difference it made was someone got jobbed in fantasy football.

20-17 Jets, off two huge throws by Sanchez.


on 3rd & 3, Henne steps up and delivers a 14 yard completion to Fasano


53 yards!

24-20 Fish.


come on D
Thomas Jones rushes for 6
2nd & 4.. Leon Washington stuffed
3rd down... big play... Sanchez incomplete! Jets will have to punt!

Fins will get the ball with about 9 minutes left. Time to eat clock, boys.

Settle down, I said clock.

8:46 to go from the 30
Ronnie takes the Henne handoff for about 2 yards
Wildcat handoff Brown to Patrick Cobbs for no gain, Cobbs (my favorite Fin), is shaken up
3rd and long...
(9 to be exact)
Henne under center, dumps to the tight end for now gain
3 and out *sigh*


not a good punt, Jets get it at their 38

by the way, I love Chuckie Gruden on the mic, he is a revelation from his coaching persona, much like Jeff Van Gundy in the NBA

1st down.. incomplete
2nd and 10.. handoff to Jones for 7 (come on D)
3rd and 2 to be precise... Sanchez with a quick throw to Edwards for the first
dammit Sanchez is good for a noob

sigh, another bomb to Braylon, he drops it, but they call a terrible pass interference call on Will Allen. Ball placed on the 1. I am going to hurl. Terrible call.

Jones with the TD. 27-24.


Fins respond with nice gains by Ricky & Polite in the Jake Long direction. Near mid-field now already. Pat White in the game now? Huh?

Hands off to Ronnie for a gain of 6.

White runs out of the shotgun for a first down!

Chad back in now.

False start on the center.
1st and 15, 2:47 to go, from the 40.

Wildcat, Ronnie to Ricky gains about 7 but comes up hobbling.
Ronnie takes the handoff from Henne, gains a few more
2:00 warning
3rd and 5 coming up, definitely in field goal range.
Henne beats the blitz by throwing to Camarillo for the completion!
1st down! 1:54 left

Pat White back in (I hate this)
hands off to Ronnie for no gain

Chad Henne guns a throw to Camarillo to the 4 yard line and 1st down!!!!

Brown to the 2 with :17 left and 1 timeout.

2nd down.
Henne in.

3rd down, :10 left
Wildcat formation, RONNIE IS IN!!!!!!!!


Happy Bar Mitzvah, Chad Henne.

Jets have it at the 43 yard line with :03 left.

Hail Mary time

INCOMPLETE! Fins win a great one!


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Sunday, August 23, 2009

thoughts on Mad Men episode 2, season 3, "Love Among the Ruins"

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sometimes I'm amazed that plot-wise, not much moves forward, but the performances and writing is so rich I don't really mind

  • Roger being oblivious about why no one approves of him now is kind of oblique. Don is pissed because he used Don as a scapegoat to break up with the wife. He now doesn't get why the ex or the daughter don't want to have Jane the home-wrecker at the wedding (which takes place the day after the JFK assassination, probably the season finale)

  • Betty's dad is going to be an interesting subplot -- Don made Betty happy by bringing her dad into their home, but she is going to be giving birth in a few months, and with her 2 kids and now a strokey Alzheimer's father, nothing good is going to come of it. But at least Don showed Betty some loyalty and concern.

  • I liked Peggy getting a little feminist and going after some booty when she felt frustrated by the sexist attitude at work via the Bye Bye Birdie scenes with the workers and then Don...

  • the London bosses screwing Don with the Garden is the beginning of the end for this merger, I think. Bert Cooper probably buys it back for pennies on the dollar, or Don splits off and starts his own agency.

Wednesday, July 15, 2009

Heat working "furiously" to land Boozer and Lamar Odom, per Yahoo! sports

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as an update to my earlier post..


LAS VEGAS – Pat Riley has listened to Dwyane Wade(notes) express his unease with
the Miami Heat sitting out the Eastern Conference’s arms race this summer. As
the Boston Celtics, Cleveland Cavaliers and Orlando Magic elevated themselves as
championship contenders, the Heat president sold his superstar on patience,
promising a plan to surround him with talent for the long run.

Now, the
Heat are working furiously to deliver Lamar Odom(notes) and Carlos Boozer(notes)
to the shores of Biscayne Bay. The Heat are trying to sell Odom on a five-year,
$34 million contract at the mid-level exception, and a league executive with
knowledge of the talks says Miami has also hatched a three-way proposal with the
Utah Jazz and Memphis Grizzlies to secure Boozer.

The essentials of a
possible deal would include Miami sending forward Udonis Haslem(notes) and
Dorrell Wright to Utah. Because Memphis is under the cap, Utah could move
Wright’s $2.8 million salary to the Grizzlies and save itself approximately $5.6
million with salary and luxury-tax payments. Memphis would probably get cash and
picks for its trouble. The Heat would have to send one more small contract to
make the math on the salary exchange work.

Miami could pay Boozer
his $12.7 million salary this season and own his Bird rights to sign him to an
extension next summer.

The deal isn’t considered imminent, but the Jazz
are working hard to find a suitable trade for Boozer. Utah is determined to
match the Portland Trail Blazers’ $32 million offer sheet for restricted free
agent Paul Millsap(notes). Utah has until the end of the week to match or lose
the young power forward to the Blazers. Most league executives believe that Utah
will match the offer, regardless of whether they’ve moved Boozer.

Portland is still trying to pry Tayshaun Prince(notes) out of
Detroit in a three-way deal with Utah, but Pistons president Joe Dumars hasn’t
shown an inclination to move Prince and extend Boozer’s contract, league sources
say. Several league executives are dubious of Boozer as a $14 million-a-year
player, which his agent, Rob Pelinka, has told teams it will take to sign him to
an extension. Miami could be the suitor willing to pay it.

The Los
Angeles Lakers’ standoff with Odom is still fluid, but a source close to Odom
insists he would probably only leave L.A. for Miami, not the Dallas Mavericks,
who are also pursuing him. Odom’s agent is trying to get a five-year, $45
million deal out of the Lakers, who have offered four years and $36 million.

A Tale of Two Jackos

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A good Michael Jackson cover, performed by Amanda Palmer:

A not-so-good Michael Jackson cover (Third Eye Blind) What is pretty funny is the guy who yells "STFU" to silence the crowd after Third Eye asks for a moment of silence:

Miami Heat, what to do, what to do?

Bookmark and ShareI know it's been a while, but I am in the mood to rekindle the PCL blog...

This is a weird time in Heat history. Usually Pat Riley has things in total control or at least he makes it seem like he's in control. This is the first time in his tenure that I can remember this to not be the case.

The 2010 plan. We've been hearing about this for years, basically since Dwyane Wade decided to sign only a 3 year contract instead of a lengthier one after the 2007 season. He seemingly coordinated his free agency to coincide with LeBron James' and Chris Bosh's exit years. Riley constructed Shaquille O'Neal's extension to expire this year, to maximize potential cap space.

The pipe dream, in Riley's mind anyway, I bet, has been Lebron. I think he thinks he has a .001% chance for Lebron and doesn't want to squander that opportunity.

Chris Bosh has been the name most Heat fans have been hearing about for the longest time. For several reasons, namely Toronto has rarely, if ever, kept a high profile player - whether it be Vince Carter, Tracy McGrady, or... (ok, those are the only two really notable home grown Raptors players I can remember).. but the point is it is hard for Toronto, who have always been mediocre at best, to keep players because of the taxes they have to pay in Canada as well as the distance most players are from home.

Bosh also has been seen as a good second banana, someone who would be willing to defer to Wade as a primary option. Bosh also could conceivably play forward or center in the east. The problem is, with Toronto signing Hedo Turkoglu to a large contract, it looks like Toronto is going all-in this season. They are trying to make the playoffs and convince Bosh to stay. Despite the taxes in Canada, the Raps can offer more dollars and an extra year than any other team if Bosh becomes a free agent. It seems unlikely, unless the Raptors absolutely fail this season and Bosh demands a trade and tells them they have no chance in re-signing him that they will deal him. Even if that happens, other teams can get the chance to beat the best offer the Heat would make (at best an offer of Michael Beasley, filler players and draft picks).

I've always felt that the improvement will come from a trade for a disgruntled superstar, ala the Celtics getting Kevin Garnett or the Heat getting Shaq, not convincing a Bosh level player to leave his current team for South Beach. The Heat has many expiring contracts to entice a team in salary cap hell to sell off a superstar for the chance to start over. I've thought that the mercurial Amare Stoudamire of the Phoenix Suns would be the logical choice to pick up in a trade but the recent Carlos Boozer situation also falls in this vein and makes sense on multiple levels.

The Utah Jazz had their young workhouse forward Paul Millsap sign an offer sheet with the Portland Trailblazers. If they match the offer sheet, he will be getting starter money and duplicates what Boozer gives them. He is younger and still cheaper than Boozer. Boozer has been told they will trade him. Utah, not a wealthy team, is said to have to take out a bank loan to pay for the front loaded contract Portland offered Millsap. If they don't trade Boozer by the NBA trade deadline they will have to pay a luxury tax penalty, likely to be in the tens of millions of dollars. Boozer lives in Miami in the offseason, he is close to Dwyane Wade and close to the Arison family (owners of the Heat). Boozer went to Duke with Mr. Arison's son, who was team manager for the basketball team Boozer starred on, worked for Team USA with Wade and Boozer, and is now an executive with the Heat. While undersized, Boozer is a legit 20/10 guy who doesn't demand the ball and is a fantastic offensive rebounder. To me, he is not on the level of Bosh or a healthy Amare, but he also happens to be a) available b) eager to play in Miami and c) on an expiring contract, so if it doesn't work out, or if they get the chance to sign a better player, they can let him walk and no harm done.

Unlike Amare or Bosh, Boozer can't play center. I am not sure how he and Michael Beasley fit together on the same frontline. The Heat are trying to make Beasley a small forward now, a move that puzzles me. I believe in Beasley's future as a 20+ ppg scorer. I believe if he went #3 to the Grizzlies last draft, he'd have won the rookie of the year because he'd have jacked up as many shots as he could. I am not sure that future is in Miami. I admire his ability to score, but I just never got the vibe that he has that "x" factor to be a winning player in the league. His lax demeanor bugs the hell out of me. His lack of a true position bugs the hell out of me. I know I am being unfair, he is only 20 years old, he has to grow into manhood, yadda yadda. The problem is, he is not the type of player/personality that the Heat has ever had patience for. Dwyane Wade doesn't seem to like him much. The best options for the Heat to spend their cap space on are all power forwards which is probably why they are trying to make him a 3.

If they trade for a Boozer, or sign an Amare or Bosh, in my opinion, Beasley has to be traded for a true small forward who can defend, hit open shots, and play team ball. My ideal candidate is Caron Butler, but who knows if Washington will trade him. Another name available next season may be Josh Howard, now that Dallas has Dirk Nowitzki and Shawn Marion. Memphis reportedly offered the #2 overall pick this past draft for Beasley; perhaps they'd be interested in trading Rudy Gay and Marc Gasol for him (less likely now that they traded for Zach Randolph).

Call me naive or pie-in-the-sky but I have no fear that Wade won't re-sign here. I just can't picture him going anywhere else. As I mentioned with Bosh, the Heat can offer Wade more money than anyone else. He won a title here, he became a superstar here, Riley has never settled for mediocrity. I can't see Wade leaving here to go play in New York. That team is moribund and even if it added Wade it has few other assets. How much more money can Wade possibly make in Madison Avenue endorsements? He already is a national figure. The NY media would put him under a microscope the same way they put A-Rod under one. Wade's posturing with Riley is just that-- posturing. He is trying to ensure the best outcomes, but Riley would be a fool to trade or add contracts like Toronto did with Turkoglu- because if Wade (god forbid) does leave, then you're stuck with mediocre players with bad contracts bogging you down.

This will be a loooooong season until we see how the plan unfolds, but I think patience will pay off.


Wednesday, January 21, 2009

LOST Season Premiere Live Blog "Because You Left; The Lie"

8:15 am, clock radio goes off, and a baby is awake crying in another room...
someone puts a bottle on the stove and a record on the player... we don't know who it is yet, or when it is yet...

wait, it's the island... and it's the strange Dharma guy from the Dharma movie (Dr. Marvin Candle)... he is filming the movie, so this is sometime in the past

Was that Finn De-troo-lio from the Sopranos who interrupts the filming?

The Dharma guys' drill melted underground as they are building a station... near a source of "limitless energy" that will allow them to manipulate time...
ok (they're answering stuff real early)

Dr. Chang/Candle warns the engineer not to drill too close, it'll release the energy and screw things up..

d'oh! Daniel Faraday is there! He time travelled back there?

now we're back to 2007, crazy beard Jack and Ben with Locke's corpse in the funeral home. Ben is trying to motivate Jack to get Locke in a van and go break Hurley out of the nut house. Jack asks Ben how they got here, how did this happen.. Ben replies it's because they left the island.

Jack shaves the crazy beard at a hotel and Ben lays out the plan of getting the other Oceanic 6. Ben reveals the last time he saw Locke was on the island when Ben goes to spin the wheel from last season. Jack reveals Locke told him everyone they left behind will die if he doesn't come back.

flashback to 2004, Ben spinning the wheel to move the island...

and we see Locke, apparently after the white light moves the island, in a rainstorm in the jungle, apparently alone...

Farraday and some of the islanders are shown on the raft and shirtless Sawyer and shirted Juliette are on the beach, and they realize the freighter in front of them is gone all of a sudden. Bernard and Rose show up panicked and shows the camp and food and water disappeared.
Farraday says it's not gone. Why is he wearing a tie still? In this weather? He is looking for a "constant". He hints they are back in time. (And the SNL sketch of Michael J Fox in the elevator while the cast members sing "Goin' Back in Tie-yime" is running through my head)

LOST title graphic

Kate is in 2007 with Aaron in their McMansion eating breakfast. Two guys knock on the door and pretend to be lawyers. Kate doesn't let them in the house. They want a blood sample from her and Aaron. He has a court order (so he says). They want to determine her relationship to Aaron. He refuses to say who wants the court order. She tells him to come back with the sheriff. Kate hauls ass and gets a-packing. She ain't waiting for no sheriff. Aaron (now about 3 or 4) asks where they're going, and she tells him they are going on vacation. She puts a wad of cash and a gun in her bag.

Sawyer and Juliet lead Faraday and Charlotte to find the hatch from the Dharma station to use as a constant. Sawyer slaps Faraday for not explaining WTF is going on. He explains what's going on... Ben dislodged the island from "time". The island may be moving through time or just them, the people, are moving in time.

cut to Locke, climbing through the jungle, where he sees a bi-plane crash, after buzzing him ala North by Northwest... he finds one of the virgin mary statues (from Mr. Eko's brother) fall out of the plane. The plane is in the tree... where he goes to climb for survivors and gets shot in the leg for his trouble. And I believe that was Ethan, the guy who kidnapped Claire way back when, with the gun.

Man you really need to have a good memory for this show, apologies if I am getting the details or names wrong from past seasons.

Locke recognizes Ethan and tells him he knows him. He tells Ethan than Ben appointed him as the leader.... and Ethan is about to shoot him when a white light comes again and it is night time out all of a sudden. I think they are hiccuping through time. Sawyer asks a great question "When are we now", and Daniel says "we're in the past or future"

cut to Sun walking through an airport, on her way to LA. The ticket agent looks at her passport and it gets flagged in the computer. Sun is taken to a cell in the airport. Charles Widmore is there. He is angry with Sun for showing him no respect when she barged in their meeting last season. Widmore says Sun mentioned common interests. He asks what those were, and she says to kill Benjamin Linus.

Back to Jack and Ben, watching the news seeing Hugo escaped (we know Sayid broke him out of the looney bin). Cut to Hurley and Sayid at a drivethrough getting food. They pull into a motel or apartment house. Sayid tells Hurley he has been working for Ben, and if he ever runs into Ben, Hurley should do the opposite whatever Ben says. Sayid theows a would-be assassin off the building and goes into hand to hand combat with another guy. He shoots a dart into Sayid.
(Dude, you got a fuckin dart in your neck!) (What? You're crazy! I like you, but you're CRAZY)

Sayid goes down, but is playing possum (he apparently has spent the last several years building immunity to iocaine powder). He smacks the dart shooter with a frying pan. Then throws him on a basketful of knives in the dishwasher (see, that's why I always put the knives sharp side down in the basket). Hurley grabs the gun, when the pedestrians in the parking lot see the dead body Sayid threw overboard and crazy house escapee Hurley standing over them with the gun. They scatter and Hurley shleps Sayid away.

back to the Jungle with Charlotte and Miles Strom the angry medium and Charlotte and Sawyer and Faraday. They see the Hatch, blown up. They deduce they are now back in the future. Faraday explains the string theory of time, that they can't change history. Like Charlie dies no matter what.

Back to Locke, who is now on the ground by the plane. Still shot in the leg. The plane is now on the ground (from when he knocked it down) and Locke goes into it for shelter. He sees someone coming towards him with a torch. He draws his knife, and we see it's immortal Richard (who recognizes him). John asks "when am I" and Richard replies "it's all relative". Richard says he didn't go anywhere when the white light came, Locke did. He tells Locke he will jump soon, and the next time they see each other Richard won't recognize him, and hands him a compass. He tells Locke to save the island he has to get the Oceanic 6 back to the Island. He tells Locke that to get them back he has to die.

White flash and Locke is in daylight again.

the Plane is back in the trees. When are we? In the past. Locke has the compass.

Sawyer's gang is back at the hatch... white light time.. now it's daylight and the hatch is back, not blown up. Sawyer goes to the back door to get supplies. Farraday tries to tell him it won't work, that you can't change the past. (not sure whats the big deal about getting supplies). Juliette gets Sawyer to go back to the beach. Charlotte has a nose bleed. Farraday is freaked out, Charlotte seems non-plussed (when was the last time you saw someone break out a non-plussed?). Daniel goes through his journal to find some bit of info while they leave, and HE knocks on the door that he wouldn't let Sawyer go through. It's Desmond who answers in a bio hazard suit with a rifle. He asks Daniel if he is the replacement, and he says no. Farraday tells a confused Desmond that if the helicopter takes him off the island in the future, and they get on a freighter, to save his friends, he needs to go to Oxford University and find Farraday's mother... her name is... and Desmond wakes up seemingly from a dream, in apparently 2007, next to Penny.

Desmond says he had a dream while he was on the island... she tells him they haven't been on the Island in 3 years. He says it wasn't a dream, it was a memory. They are on a yacht and Des sets sail (a three hour tour? a three hour tour?)... he tells her they are going to Oxford.

Title card says "three years ago", and we see Frank Lapidus grab two brewskis out of the cooler... they are on Penny's rescue boat in 2004, it's the Oceanic 6 talking about the big lie they propose to tell before the world rescues them. Jack takes a poll and sees if they are all in agreement about the lie. Hurley doesn't want to lie, Jack explains its the only way to protect the ones they left behind, that Widmore wants to kill them, he already sunk a fake plane. Hurley asks Penny since he is her dad can't she do something? She says no. Hurley would rather tell the world that the island is gone, poof, disappeared. Jack says they'll think he's crazy. Hurley says not if people back him up. Sayid admits that lying is the best choice. Hurley tells Sayid he'll remember this moment and someday Sayid will need his help and he won't get it. (That's a bit harsh, Hurley).

Cut to Hurley helping poison darted Sayid, driving through the city. Hurley is getting pulled over by the cops (he is on the lam and he has an unconscious Iraqi next to him). The cop who pulls Hurley over? Ana-Lucia. It's Hurley hallucinating. She tells him he needs new clothes, a safe place, and to take Sayid to someone he trusts. She's like his antisocial Jiminy Cricket. She tells him "Libby says hi".

we're on the beach, and the adorable Rose and Bernard are trying to start a fire. I think the guy Neil was in "That Thing You Do" with Tom Hanks. He was the nerd who was interrupting the talent show (when are you going to play That Thing You Do? We came here to meet girls and dance and we can't until you play That Thing You Do!"). Sawyer and Juliet find Faraday coming out of jungle who was gone for two hours, we learn. To leave, Faraday needs to calculate a new bearing and they need to find out when they are.

Back to Weekend at Sayids as Hurley is dragging around the still drugged Iraqi. Hurley is at a gas station and buys some t-shirts (I heart Shi-Tzus). The gas station attendant says she recognizes him (but not from the fugitive picture, from the lottery and the plane rescue). He hauls ass and as he pulls out, coincidentally Kate pulls in to the same parking lot, missing each other by seconds. Aaron tells her he wants to go home. Kate pulls out a cell phone and contemplates calling Jack but doesn't. Suddenly the phone rings and "unknown" is on the caller ID. She can't believe whoever it is on the phone, she sounds glad to hear from them. She says she'll be there in half an hour. Aaron asks where they are going, and she tells him to see a friend. I think it's Sun.

Cut to Ben in the hotel room unscrewing the A/C vent and pulling a package out of it. Jack is looking for his pain pills, Ben tells him he flushed them down the terlet. Jack says he was going to do that himself and thanks Ben. Ben tells him to pack a suitcase and he's never coming back here. He says he'll pick Jack up in 6 hours. Ben tells Jack he is going to put Locke's body someplace safe, Jack says "safe? he's dead isn't he?". Ben ignores the question and tells Jack he'll be back in 6 hours.

Cut to Cheech Marin (Hurley's dad) making a baloney and caviar sandwich (I am not making this up). Maybe he has the munchies. The door knocks and he answers to see Hurley standing there with Sayid in a fireman's carry over his shoulders.

Hurley is catching his dad up to date on the escape... the LAPD is there and wants to see if Cheech has seen his son. Cheech gets rid of them. They tell Cheech that Hurley killed three people (Hurley says that Sayid did). Cheech says they need a doctor to wake Sayid up. Hurley knows what to do.

Cut to Kate and Aaron in an elevator. They are in a hotel or penthouse... and it is Sun who is there.

Cut to Ben in a butcher's shop. There's a lady butcher behind the counter. (Is it Harriet? The hard-hearted harbinger of haggis? Alas, it is not). She knows Ben and greets him by name. He tells her he has something important in his van and needs her to watch it for him. She says "he'll be safe with me" and everything is right on schedule. Whatever the plan is, she's in on it. She asks if he got Shepherd, and he says yes. She wonders if Ben bribed Jack with pills, and Ben shoots her a dirty look and gets all defensive in her grill "cut him some slack, he's been through a lot -- we all have". She acquiesces and apologizes. Ben tells "Jill" to keep Locke safe, because if she doesn't, what they are about to do won't matter at all.

Back to the island and beach, night time and they are still trying to build a fire. Finally they succeed and it flickers out. Didn't they ever see Cast Away? Charlotte brings Farraday a mango or papaya or something. She tells him she has a bad headache. And now is having patches in her memory. She can't remember her mom's maiden name. She asks Daniel he knows what is happening to her. Before he can answer, Miles comes back with dinner, a wild boar that had been dead in the jungle. Nerdy Neil is pushing everyone's buttons. Like a red shirted guy from Star Trek, he is dead, as flaming arrows (sounds like a gay cover band) fly through the air out of nowhere and one hits him. Sawyer and Friends scatter to try and avoid the assault.

The remaining Losties scatter as random ones eat it.

Hurley is stuck in his dad's house as the cops are staking out the place. His mom has come home and asks why there is a dead Pakistani on her couch. LOL. Hurley's dad sneaks them out of the house in his truck.

Kate and Sun are catching up. Sun shows Kate her baby's picture. Sun asks if Kate is alright. Kate tells Sun someone knows they are lying, some lawyers came to her house asking for a blood sample. Sun says they weren't interested in exposing the lie, they just want Aaron. If they wanted to expose the lie they would just do it. Sun tells Kate she needs to get rid of them, any way she can. Kate asks "what kind of person do you think I am?" Cut to Jin on the freighter from the end of last season, when Sun reminds Kate that she told Sun to get on the chopper and Kate would get Jin. Kate is crying. Sun says "you're a person who does what she had to do, and if she hadn't they all would have died not just her husband". Sun says she doesn't blame Kate. She asks how Jack is. They cut away before we find out if she tells Sun that as far as Kate knows he is bat shit crazy.

Cut to Cheech, who has met up with clean cut Jack. Cheech brings him to Sayid's comatose body in the trunk, covered up by a lovely poncho. Jack says they have to bring Sayid to a hospital. Jack says he'll do what he has to despite Cheech saying if they go to the hospital the hitmen will finish the job. Cheech says if they do that for Jack, then Jack has to stay away from Hugo. Jack calls Ben and tells him he has Sayid.

Cut to Hurley, back at the McMansion with his mamacita. Hurley tells his mom that they all lied about the crash. He tells her they crashed on a crazy island. With the smoke monster. With the Others. With the Button. And the Hatches. And Desmond's Girlfriend's Father. And the freighter. With the killers. The rest of the people are still on the island, and he starts crying. She tells him she believes him, even though he sounds crazy.

He says all the bad stuff is happening because they lied.

Back to Sawyer and Juliet in the jungle. They are captured by guys with machetes who demand what they are doing on the island?

Cut to Jack in the hospital, he is working on Sayid. Who wakes up and tries to choke Jack before he realizes who he is. Jack tells Sayid that Cheech brought him to Jack. Sayid asks where Hurley is and Jack says at home with his mother.

Cut to Hurley heating up a burrito in the microwave.

He turns to find Ben standing over his shoulder and he throws the burrito at him in panic. He tells Hugo that Ben has a car waiting to get rid of him. That Ben knows Sayid is with Jack. Hurley says its a mind game and they'd never trust him. Ben says they came around and realized they all want the same thing: to go back to the island. Ben says if he comes with, he'd never have to lie again. Hurley runs out to the police, that's how much he wants away from Ben. He admits to killing the people. He smirks as Ben leaves.

Cut back to the Island with Sawyer and Juliet - and the army men who demand answers and are abount to cut off Juliet's hand, when someone saves them and kills the captors -- Locke.

Cut to a lab with a weird person in a cloak doing equations on the blackboard. Where does one buy a cloak these days? Cloaks R Us? The Cloak Barn? Cloak and Barrel? Cloaky goes up a spiral staircase to a room filled with lit candles - it's Ben in the candle room, and cloaky tells him he has 70 hours. Cloaky turns around and reveals herself to be the weird whitehaired english lady who refused to sell Desmond the engagement ring back in the day and explained the theory that whatever will happen cannot be changed. I am guessing she is Farraday's mother as well as being the Time Lady. Ben asks what happens if he can't get them all together in 70 hours? She says "God help us all".


whoo. VERY action packed episode. What did you guys think?

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LOST live blog "Destiny Calls"

ok... the 8-9 hour is a clip show and documentary on the show, I will live blog beginning at 9

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I'm back! LOST live blog tonight

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