Pop Culture Lane: May 2008

according to Yahoo, Comedy Central is bringing back "The Gong Show", the iconically cheesy game show I remember from my early childhood. While the old version was created and hosted by Chuck Barris, this new version will be hosted by the hilarious Dave Atell.

LOS ANGELES (Hollywood Reporter) - The gong is back.

Comedy Central has green-lighted an updated version of the 1970s talent show, ordering eight half-hour episodes of "The Gong Show With Dave Attell," to premiere July 17.

The series will feature offbeat acts judged by a panel of three revolving celebrity judges. A talent search is under way.

Attell hosted four seasons of Comedy Central's "Insomniac With Dave Attell" and recently appeared in his own standup special on HBO.

"Dave is the perfect guy to host this series," said Lauren Corrao, president of original programming and development at the cabler. "His dry, comedic wit paired with the outspoken personalities of our celebrity judges and the outrageous acts will create a fresh take on the famed series."

Holly Jacobs, senior vice president syndication and reality at Sony, called "Gong Show" an "iconic" format that will now be introduced to a new generation of viewers.

Added Attell: "Stars will be made; feelings will be hurt."

Reuters/Hollywood Reporter

Opening scene... 1950s girl dancing to "Everyday" by Buddy Holly (I think?), "Emily" having an argument with her mother about going out with a man twice her age... she runs into the street and is hit by a car. She is being wheeled through a hospital when she tells the nurse she's 6 months pregnant... she's now in labor and delivers a boy...he gets put in an incubator, and is name is John (Locke?)

cut to Locke, Hurley, and Ben in the jungle looking for Jacob's cabin... they are... LOST. Locke decides they'll make camp for the night. Hurley asks what happens when the freighter guys come back. Locke says he doesn't know. Cut to Desmond on the freighter sleeping on a cot. Sayid wakes him up to tell him the helicopter is back. The doctor checks on one of the injured soldiers and Keamy tells him a smoke monster ripped his guts out. Keamy points a gun at the captain and tells the captain that he "gave him up". That (Ben) knew all about Keamy's history. Cut to Keamy & the captain finding Michael on the freighter, and they hurt him and ask him if he gave Ben the info. Michael says yes. (Real smart). Martin goes to shoot him but is out of bullets. The captain says don't kill him, Michael is the only one who knows how to fix the engine. Keamy asks how does he know this? The captain says it's because Michael was the one who broke them.

LOST swoosh logo (commercial break)

Locke awakes in the hjungle to a chopping noise. He looks around and Hurley and Ben are still sleeping.... he finds a guy in a Dharma initiative jumpsuit knocking down a tree. He tells John his name is "Horace" who is building a place for him and "the mrs". He explains sometimes they need a break from the DI (Dharma Initiative).

-tangent: I can't hear the Dharma Initiative without thinking of the charming Jenna Elfman, and if she is still as cute as she was in that movie where Ben Stiller plays the rabbi and Ed Norton plays the priest... also I must check to see if the Harlem Choir's version of "Ayn Kelohanu" is on itunes

Horace tells John he probably isn't making sense, because he's been dead for 12 years. Horace tells Locke he has to find him (Horace) and when he does he'll find Jacob. Jacob has been waiting for Locke a long time. John wakes up with the Lost iconic eye camera shot. Ben is watching John. Ben tells Locke he used to have dreams too.

Cut to the 1950s hospital. The nurse calls her Mrs. Locke, and that John is the youngest preemie to ever make it in the hospital. Calls him a miracle baby. Locke's mother tells the nurse she is unable to hold the baby, and runs out of the room crying. There's a man watching the scene, and it's Ben's right hand man Richard. Richard is always the same age in every flashback, he's immortal or a time traveller or something.

cut to Locke, Ben, and Hurley back on the trail trying to find Jacob's cabin and presumably Horace. By the way, I just looked up the Roman poet "Horace", he's the cat who came up with "Carpe Diem" (translated: Seize the Day), Dulce et decorum est pro patria mori (It is Sweet & Fitting to Die for One's Country), and Aurea Mediocritas (The Golden Mean).

Hurley has a theory why they are the only ones who can see the cabin: it's because they are the craziest. Locke decides they are going to make a sidetrip before finding the cabin. He asks Hurley if he ever wondered whatever happened to the Dharma Initiative people. Ben gets a "zoinks" look on his face (remember Ben massacred them all). Locke takes them to the mass grave he was in when Ben shot him at the end of last season. Hurley asks what happened to them... Locke points to Ben and says "he did".

Commercial.

Back in the 1950s...Immortal Richard is in a house to visit little John playing backgammon. He tells John he runs a school for kids who are "special" and John might be one of then. Richard notices a drawing on the wall and asks little John if he drew it, it looks like the smoke monster killing someone.

Richard pulls out some objects and asks Richard to look at them and think about them. They are a baseball mitt, a comic book, a book of laws, a vial of dirt, a hunting knife, a compass..

he asks John what of these object belong to him.. little John asks "to keep?", and Richard says "no, which of these belong to you...already". Little John takes the knife. Richard says "it doesn't", packs up and leaves. He tells John's mother that he isn't ready for their special school and exits.

Back at the gravesite, Ben tells Hurley he didn't kill the Dharma people, it wasn't his decision, it was their leader's. Hurley says "I thought you were their leader" and Ben says "not always". John is in the gravesite and finds Horace's skeleton (the jumpsuit had his name on it). In the jumpsuit he finds blueprints for the cabin and tells them that Horace was building it.

Back on the freighter, Lapidus tells the Captain and Keamy that the other soldier died. The doc couldn't help him. Keamy tells Lapidus to gas up the chopper, they are going back to the island. The captain tells Keamy while he was gone the crew was showing signs of some sort of mental sickness and that Keamy may be affected by the same thing. He takes the key from the captain and enters the office. They are going to open a safe. They find a protocol that says where Ben is going, and that Widmore is a smart man. Keamy says they are going to torch the island and they know the only safe place Ben could go to. The captain tells Sayid & Desmond to hide in the pantry. Sayid says hiding is pointless, he wants the life raft to go back to the island and ferry the people to safety. The captain seemingly agrees and tells them to go to the raft in 10 minutes.

Back to Locke, Ben, and Hurley. It wasn't blueprints, it's a map to the cabin. Locke tells Hurley he can leave and go back to the beach. He tells Hurley he thought he needed him to find the cabin and now feels bad because he forced him at gun point. Hurley declines and opts to stay with Ben & Locke.

Cut to John in high school, he is locked in a school locker and banging to get out. A teacher lets him out and all the cheerleaders are laughing at him. The teacher tells him he got a call from a Dr. Alpert (Richard) who wants him to come to Science Camp. John says he's not a nerdy scientist, the teacher tells him he can't be the prom king or a superhero, he is a scientist to be. Puberty John tells the teacher off and leaves.

Lapidus goes to Michael (who is hurt and locked in a room) and asks why he didn't tell Lapidus he was a survivor of Flight 815. Michael says "you wouldn't have believed me" and Lapidus says "I told you I am the only person in the world who thinks the crash was a hoax, and you didn't think I'd believe you?". Michael says Lapidus' boss put the plane there. Michael tells him Keamy is going to kill everyone on the island and not to fly him back. Lapidus leaves and we see Keamy strapping a radio or some sort of device to his arm.

The captain tells the Sayid and Dez to follow the heading that Faraday says is the only safeway back. Dez says he can't go back with Sayid, he has been on the island for 3 years and that he'll never set foot on it again. Not when Penny is coming for him. Sayid says he'll be back with the first batch of Oceanic survivors ASAP.

The freighter is called Kahana, by the way.

Sayid motors on the life raft towards the island.

Cut to the jungle at night, with Ben, Locke, and Hurley looking for the cabin. Ben says all the things that happened to him, his spinal tumor, his daughter's death HAD to happen to him, they were his destiny, and that Locke will soon see that being chosen has consequences. "Destiny is a fickle bitch" says Ben.

Hurley finds the cabin. Cut to Locke a few years ago in a rehab center trying to relearn how to walk. His orderly tells him not to give up. Locke scoffs and says his spine was crushed. The orderly says he survived an 8 story fall out of a building and that's a miracle. We see the orderly's face and it's Abadon, the bald black guy who sees Hurley in the first episode of this season, who employed Naomi (he also played the narc cop on Oz)... He asks Locke if he believes in miracles, Locke says no, and he says you should, I had one happen to me. He wheels Locke to a flight of stairs and tells him he needs to go on a "walkabout". Locke says he can't, he's a cripple. Abadon tells Locke he went on one and found out who he was. Locke sarcastically replies "an orderly", and Abadon says "I am more than an orderly, John". He tells Locke when he's ready he'll listed to what he's saying... and then when they meet each other again, Locke will owe him one.

Cut to the freighter where Keamy and his men are gathering guns and weapons to go back to the island. One of Keamy's men says to the doctor "the morse code I got on the beach said the doctor washed up with his throat slashed, isn't that weird?".. the doctor says "well I'm the doctor"..

Lapidus refuses to take Keamy back to the island, and Keamy slashes the doctor's throat to change Frank's mind. The captain fires a shot towards Keamy. Keamy shoots the captain. Frank agrees to fly them. He turns on his satellite phone and hides it and flies them away.

commercial

Back on the beach, Juliet admonishes Jack for leaving his tent (from the surgery last week). They hear the chopper. They see the chopper and it flies past them. Jack's sat phone is beeping and sees it flying away from them. He thinks the guys on the chopper want them to follow.

Cut to Ben, Hurley, and Locke. Ben tells Locke he isn't going in the cabin. The island wanted him to get sick and Locke to get well, and its Locke's turn now. Hurley says he isn't going in either. Ben wishes him luck. Locke approaches the cabin and lights a lamp. Someone is in the rocking chair (I think). Locke asks him if he is Jacob, the chair answers no and says he can speak on Jacob's behalf. It's Christian (Jack's father). Locke sits down with him. "You know why I am here" asks John. "Yeah, sure" says Christian. "Do you?". Locke says "I'm here because I was chosen to be". Christian says "that's absolutely right". Locke looks over and sees Claire in the room. He asks what she's doing there, she says "I'm fine, I'm with (Christian)." Shit, this is getting good.

Locke asks what Claire is doing there and where the baby is. Christian says the baby is fine, he is where he needs to be. CHristian tells John not to tell anyone Claire is there with them. John asks why not and Christian says the men from the boat will be back soon and it won't matter, and tells John to ask the one question that matters. Locke asks "how do I save the island"? An almost imperceptible smile comes across Claire's face when John asks that.

Cut to Hurley and Ben outside the cabin. Hurley takes out a candy bar and gives Ben half. They see Locke emerge from the cabin and he approaches them. Ben asks "did he tell you what we're supposed to do?". Locke says yes, and tells Ben he wants them to move the island.

LOST.